THE SHIT I THINK AND FEEL

In a recent coaching group, one of the participants spoke of the need for elders as guides in the tribe bringing wisdom to parenting. This rang loudly in my heart as I held the energy of her statement along with the feelings she so accurately described. As I sit with this concept, I recognize the vision I have held dear of sitting amongst the village, each individual revered for their gifts they contribute in support of the collective

Raising children in our society comes with gifts, and also many challenges. Where does one turn for advice that aligns with their soul’s purpose as well as their human experience. How does one find the models and elders to walk with them through this sometimes grueling position of mother and father? How does one know which methods and insights apply to how they want to do this thing called parenting? And then the question that comes pounding into my heart is who is giving voice to the children? And what are the children saying?

It’s an intricate dance of complex dynamics, as a parent, how do I have my own needs met while meeting the needs of my child? What is my role, my duty, my place in this unfolding of a human being? We have been conditioned to be in our heads, to approach parenting from a systematic view. My child has this challenge so I should do this because this “expert” coined a term and tried a set of strategies that has helped many. But the problem here, is the focus on the challenge, which comes from a lens of I need to control, to fix, to identify, to label. And in this push for labeling, we have created too many categories for individualism, further separating us from each other and the divine.

I ask you, is your child their struggles? Are you your shortcomings? Or is there more to them? More to you? Truth, you are so much more. Truth, focus on the challenges keeps us in the grips of fear and doubt. We have a narrative that we need to understand and categorize to make sense of what’s before us. But what if we could remove all that and just look at what is before us and view it from a lens of wonder and curiosity towards the beauty and greatness inherent in all of the gripe?

We are flailing right now, trying like mad to make senses and define the children in front of us. What if these children, so resolute in their opinions desperate to have their voices heard are our guides and teachers? What if they are illuminating to us that we have it all wrong? Our focus displaced? What if these children, so wise and aware are here to say enough! We won’t take this shit anymore? We can’t tolerate the negativity. We won’t be quieted and we won’t back down until we see true justice, and a world operating from the heart? What if these kids are the way-showers, here to teach us?